Kodi Arfer / Wisterwood

Pooty Boy's Life: A Small Excerpt

Topic List
#001 | Pooty Boy |
Ok, so not too long ago I made a topic that stated I was very excited for an upcoming event in my life, and it could lead to happiness or sadness. Well, this event did take place, and I've come to the determination that it did lead to happiness, just EASILY not in the way I expected or thought I wanted. So sit back, keep reading, and let me spin you a tale of a man, a woman, and a revelation.

As you may remember, my long term girlfriend broke up with me in May of this year. Needless to say, I was devastated. I loved this girl with every fiber of my being. I loved her more than I thought any man could love a woman. More than I ever thought people were able to care about each other. And she left one day with no warning whatsoever. Again, needless to say, I was crushed.

Now, that isn't to say that we didn't have our problems. I am, admittedly, a selfish person. There were times when I didn't want to do what she wanted. Times when I didn't want to go the places she wanted to go. Times when I didn't listen to her needs because they didn't coincide with mine.

She, too, had her problems. She had/has issues at home, especially with her father. He is not a good father by any means, and really neglects to show her any love at all. As a result, she has some major daddy issues that she took out on me. She has some major self-esteem issues because of this. She CONSTANTLY needed to be reassured that I wanted to be with her, and held me to an immense double-standard. For example, she could talk to however many men she wanted (platonic, of course), yet she didn't trust me enough - because of her father - to ever allow me to have platonic female friends.

I could go on and on, but I won't. I just wanted to give you all a small taste of the issues. A majority of my friends disliked her and thought she was too controlling of me and really weighed down my life. Of course, being in love as I was, I didn't see this.

Let's move on to the break-up. We broke up in May, a mere week after my college graduation. This was a time of uncertainty and change in my life, and I admittedly was a little scared. Perhaps I even got quiet. She took this as me "fading away" and not being there to take care of her. At this point she allowed another man to infiltrate her mind and make her doubt our future together. She, being influential and unstable, fell for it and left me, citing that she didn't think she could trust me.

Let the devastation commence.

I then proceed to blame myself for it and go into a tailspin of one-night stands and bitter nights alone. We saw each other once at a party in June, barely spoke, and then never again. I tried so hard to forget about her and move on, but in the back of my mind I foolishly held on to the hope that she'd come back, despite all her shortcomings and the warnings from my friends that I was better off. When you love someone, the problems don't always matter.

Fast forward to early November, around the time I posted the other topic. I had an urge to text her for some reason, and she informed me that she had fallen ill with an iron deficiency. I, being the protective man that I am, attempted to comfort her in that I know how hard her iron deficiency can be. Later that night she texted me and told me how much it meant to her that I was so sweet to her. Of course I begin to think "maybe this is the beginning of us getting back together?" We spoke frequently over the next week or so and really began to rebuild a relationship. She, being about a year and a half younger than me, is still away at school, but asked if we could do something over the thanksgiving holiday. I agreed, again with the hope of sweeping her off her feet again.
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"A special effect without a story is a pretty boring thing." - George Lucas
#002 | Pooty Boy |
So of course I saw her the first night she returned to town (I suppose I should also say we ironically grew up in the exact same hometown, yet never met each other until college - she went to a high school a mere 7 miles from mine), and we went out to dinner. We caught up, and everything was very smooth. Natural, even. Even after about six months it felt like not 6 days had gone by. We spent the night together that night, and I felt like a man who got the second chance he didn't deserve. Yet it was not meant to be. Of the 9 days she was in town, we saw each other 7 of them (and the only reason it wasn't every day was because one day she spent with her family and the other she left relatively early to go back to school) and I say a girl that I hadn't seen before. I saw a girl who was extremely judgmental and rude. I saw a girl who had no self-confidence and obviously has very little self-worth. I saw a girl who expects the world - me, especially - to hand her everything and never ask questions. To allow her to walk all over me and take advantage of me.

And finally, I saw the real girl. I saw the girl that everyone else say. That my friends saw. That my parents saw. I saw the girl that I so never wanted to believe existed. And for that, I was shockingly happy. I had finally broken her spell over me. I finally see that as beautiful as she is on the outside, she's equally as horrid on the inside.

Finally, after six long months of beating myself up, I realize that I DON'T want to hold her hand anymore. That I DON'T want to sit across a table from her. I realize that I can and have moved on and that there is someone perfect out there for me, and it isn't her.

And for that, the smile on my face these days is a real one. I'm me again. I'm Brandon. And boy have I missed him. :)
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"A special effect without a story is a pretty boring thing." - George Lucas
#003 | BUM |
A sweeping tale of drama! - New York BUM
For the effort put in, I give it four stars! - BUM Tribune
A tragic tale of love, loss, and recovery... 'tis better to have loved and lost than never loved at all - BUM Post

Glad you're doing well, sounds like a level up in your life!
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#004 | Kodiologist |
Interesting story, and I'm glad it's all worked out for the best, finally. All I can add is what I always say: romance is for chumps!

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If f_n is continuous on [a, b] for all n, (f_n(x)) is nonincreasing for each x, and (f_n) goes pointwise to a continuous f, then (f_n) goes to f uniformly.
#005 | freepizza |
Did she ever choke you for refusing intercourse?
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"...you should try reading my posts being getting all emo." --FoxMetal
#006 | Ocarinakid2 |
Dang, that sounds like some long term turmoil. Glad to hear you're back to your old self though. And hey, at least you got to experience all the wonders of a depressing tailspin.
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Ocarinakid
#007 | Pooty Boy |
I was never choked.

Tied up, yes, but never choked.
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"A special effect without a story is a pretty boring thing." - George Lucas
#008 | HeyDude |
Wow. Glad you came out OK Brandon.
#009 | Kodiologist |
Relevant, and awesome in any case:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G0dUhYc0sic

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If f_n is continuous on [a, b] for all n, (f_n(x)) is nonincreasing for each x, and (f_n) goes pointwise to a continuous f, then (f_n) goes to f uniformly.
#010 | Pooty Boy |
Thank you, everyone.

It's just so refreshing to have a bitter chapter of my life finally come to a close!
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"A special effect without a story is a pretty boring thing." - George Lucas