Kodi Arfer / Wisterwood

Do you have a harder time waking up for work when your significant other is over

Topic List
#001 | Jacehan |
?

I find this is often the case for me, but I think part of it is because when he's over I sleep on the other side of the bed, against the wall, which just makes it physically harder to get out of bed. But then there's also the fact that I don't want to.

(For Alex and Gary, I suppose it's just a comparison of pre-marriage to post.)
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"To truly live, one must first be born." ~ Evan [aX]
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#002 | HeyDude |
For me it's just the want-to and the consideration of a sleeping person. It's not all pre-marriage either... Jess stays the night out at her parents now and then and whenever she does I am early to work. I can just pop out of bed, turn the light on, bang clumsily around, etc., which helps me get ready faster.
#003 | Kodiologist | | (edited)
The more I think about, the more odd it seems to me that people who are in love literally sleep together. Someone who you enjoy being with while awake is not necessarily someone whose body heat and snoring you'll want to sample every August night.

Relatedly, I suspect that couples would get along better if they each had "a room of one's own" they could retreat to whenever they wanted. Sometimes a body needs to be alone.

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On my good days, my Spirit Pokémon is a Meowth. On my bad days, it's a Psyduck.
#004 | Mith |
Meh, doesn't really come into play in my case. We both wind up getting up at the same time, me to get ready for work and her to get D ready to go to school.

Weekends are a different story, however. They spend Friday nights out in the living room on the couches having their sleepover night (which consists of movies, popcorn, and videogames) so when I come out in the morning to go to work at 6, I tend to wake at least Harriet up. Saturdays he spends the evenings at friends houses or at one of the grandparents places for, umm, *our time*, so we are typically both equally exhausted come Sunday morning and we both tend to sleep till 10 or so.
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#005 | Kodiologist |
You sexile your own son? Can't you just screw quietly?

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On my good days, my Spirit Pokémon is a Meowth. On my bad days, it's a Psyduck.
#006 | HeyDude |
Kids tend to think of something they need and walk into the room.
#007 | Kodiologist |
Which is probably why bedroom doors traditionally have locks.

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On my good days, my Spirit Pokémon is a Meowth. On my bad days, it's a Psyduck.
#008 | Ocarinakid2 |
For work, no, not really. She is a snooze button kind of person, whereas I've always found it easier to just get a cup of coffee and deal with the misery of being awake. Weekends however, yeah, it's nice to lounge around together.

And Kodi, I feel the same way. It's actually kinda bizarre (but also nice to wake up to [and occasionally horrible, what with the blanket hogging and deep sleep drool]).
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Ocarinakid
#009 | willis5225 |
I seem to recall reading mainstream media coverage of a study about how dude's sleep worse with a partner in the same bed.

*I* sleep worse because my girlfriend's cat is a jerk. And the cats necessitate that we stay at her house.
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Willis, it seems like every other time you post, I need to look up a word that's in the OED or Urban Dictionary but not both.
-Mimir
#010 | BUM |
I wouldn't say it's harder to do so, unless there is no pressing reason to vacate, in which case I may lounge awhile.

I agree that some couples would do well with separate beds or possibly rooms. I think it depends on how the couple is, though. No rule fits all, kind of thing.
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#011 | Kodiologist |
From: willis5225 | Posted: 3/5/2012 10:53:49 PM | #009
*I* sleep worse because my girlfriend's cat is a jerk.

I feel ya. When I was visiting my parents this weekend, our old cat Shadow decided to yowl at three in the morning. I locked him in the bathroom on a different floor.

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On my good days, my Spirit Pokémon is a Meowth. On my bad days, it's a Psyduck.
#012 | willis5225 | | (edited)
Ugh. That should read "a dude's sleep is worse."
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Willis, it seems like every other time you post, I need to look up a word that's in the OED or Urban Dictionary but not both.
-Mimir
#013 | Mith |
Quotation of post #005 by Kodiologist

Yep and nope
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Swordians rule.
#014 | willis5225 |
Good man.
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Willis, it seems like every other time you post, I need to look up a word that's in the OED or Urban Dictionary but not both.
-Mimir
#015 | Kodiologist |
Well, Gary, you're certainly not alone in feeling that sex should be as barbaric and frenzied as possible. In college, I had at least two dormmates (not roommates or suitemates, thank goodness) who made a point of having noisy sex. Perhaps it's my own fault for not having the chutzpah to tell them to pipe down, but if I had, my complaint might have only encouraged them. Sounds like a good TV Tropes page: "Screw the Rules, I Have Gonads".

But perhaps this sort of behavior says more about people's attitudes about noise than about sex. It frightens me how noisy workplaces are and how noisy people keep their homes with television and music. Sure you can still do whatever you like while enveloped in all this distraction, but can you do it just as well? I'm guessing not. I don't think people are immune to being congitively handicapped by noise any more than they are by multitasking, if only because working on a task while subconciously analyzing all that noise for meaningful signals (like one's own name) is itself a kind of multitasking. People treat me like a petty nerd when I tell them to quiet down so I can work or sleep or think, but I'm not petty—merely extremely serious.

Incidentally, lust, like many other feelings, often appears to act as a kind of affective noise, the everpresent whine of a ghostly mosquito that can never be swatted, only ignored, as one pursues what actually matters. It makes life more interesting, but no easier.

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On my good days, my Spirit Pokémon is a Meowth. On my bad days, it's a Psyduck.
#016 | BUM |
What certainly is striking (probably intentionally so) about your post is the snippet: what actually matters. Now, incidentally, I agree that lust is a rotten thing and it really just gets in the way of other things, akin to hunger or thirst, that can be bedded down but comes back again later. But why, anyway, is lust or sex being dismissed as something that doesn't actually matter? (Or, rather, why is there something that actually does matter, is perhaps a question I'd prefer)

I don't know. I have this problem with, for example, Socrates (mind you, I don't mean "beef" with Socrates so much as a question I would like him to explain). He keeps going on and on about how the pursuits of common men are idle and nourishing of the body, but his pursuit of the truth is somehow more noble and nourishes the soul. Since I don't believe in souls, then the mind is clearly just another piece of the body, so what's any more noble about any pursuits of the mind? Aren't they just meaningless nourishment, pleasing to the organ in our heads in lieu of that one down below?
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#017 | willis5225 |
Can we make a distinction between "barbaric" and "loud"?
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Willis, it seems like every other time you post, I need to look up a word that's in the OED or Urban Dictionary but not both.
-Mimir
#018 | Kodiologist |
Well, you know my own philosophy of life (it was discussed in, for example, http://arfer.net/pms/topics/60979321). I do have a problem with the common implicit philosophy of life I call "experientialism", the idea that experiences (sexual, intellectual, gustatory, or whatever) are worth having for their own sake, which is invoked, for example, when we praise someone as having "lived a full life". But as I was talking about in that other topic, I can't very meaningfully criticize other philosophies of life, because the differences between my philosophy of life and anybody else's are mostly a matter of incompatible axioms.

What I was really talking about in that last paragraph of my previous post was that feelings often run counter or are irrelevant to our goals, whatever they are. Even if you like having sex, chances are you don't spend all day every day hunting it.

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On my good days, my Spirit Pokémon is a Meowth. On my bad days, it's a Psyduck.
#019 | Kodiologist | | (edited)
From: willis5225 | Posted: 3/7/2012 7:57:18 AM | #017
Can we make a distinction between "barbaric" and "loud"?

Sure, there are other ways to be barbaric than being loud. :P

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On my good days, my Spirit Pokémon is a Meowth. On my bad days, it's a Psyduck.
#020 | BUM |
I can dig that.
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#021 | Kodiologist |
[This message was deleted at the request of the original poster]
#022 | Mith |
From: willis5225 | #017
Can we make a distinction between "barbaric" and "loud"?

Seriously. Skill, not force. =þ
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http://lostfacts.net/boards
Swordians rule.
#023 | Jacehan |
And as the Avenue Q song says, "You Can Be As Loud As the Hell You Want (When You're Making Love)."

I think the noise issue, Kodi, has to do with the environment you grew up in. I find silence to be much more distracting than noise. And I can't sleep in silence, either. I grow too introspective. I guess I would agree that the noise is distracting, but I want it to be. And that can help me focus: the noise distracts the brain from thinking about 20 things at once, so I can actively think about just 1.
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"To truly live, one must first be born." ~ Evan [aX]
Paper Mario Social:
The Safe Haven of GameFAQs. (Board 2000083)
#024 | Kodiologist |
From: Jacehan | Posted: 3/7/2012 9:23:22 PM | #023
I think the noise issue, Kodi, has to do with the environment you grew up in.

In the sense that children may be even more sensitive to detrimental effects of noise than adults, yes. (http://www.centerforgreenschools.org/docs/acoustical-barriers-to-learning.pdf)

I'd like to cite some papers I read in my junior year of college that demonstrated that experience with noise does not remove its distracting effects, but my PsycINFO-fu is failing me.

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On my good days, my Spirit Pokémon is a Meowth. On my bad days, it's a Psyduck.
#025 | willis5225 |
Is it really noisy? That might be the problem.
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Willis, it seems like every other time you post, I need to look up a word that's in the OED or Urban Dictionary but not both.
-Mimir
#026 | Kodiologist |
It's pretty quiet in my office (otherwise, I'd never work there), but I may well be confusing papers about noise with papers about multitasking, which I read in the same class and had similar themes.

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On my good days, my Spirit Pokémon is a Meowth. On my bad days, it's a Psyduck.
#027 | Pooty Boy |
It really depends.

I'm always up about an hour and fifteen minutes before she is and I need to leave about 45 minutes before her. Often I'll find myself cuddling with her until the last possible second, but, if I were alone, I'd still be laying there checking the news on my phone. So, either way, I do lay in bed for a while before I get up.

I think it really depends on how awake she is. If she's up, I'm not going anywhere. If she's still asleep I can go at my leisure.
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#028 | willis5225 |
The cat got messed up by daylight savings time, in that she now attempts to wake everyone up at 5:00 but it is really 6:00 by convention. Which I am counting as a win for man over nature.
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Willis, it seems like every other time you post, I need to look up a word that's in the OED or Urban Dictionary but not both.
-Mimir
#029 | ShadowSpy |
"Relatedly, I suspect that couples would get along better if they each had "a room of one's own" they could retreat to whenever they wanted. Sometimes a body needs to be alone."

If I remember correctly, there was some study which suggests exactly this. Married couples who sleep in separate beds/rooms stay married longer.

Regardless, I'd say couples sleep in the same bed because it gives a feeling of intimacy (before and after sleeping, and maybe even during).
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"I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific."