I've spent the last two days totally confusing myself

Sometimes thinking out of boredom is a very bad thing...

Clarify a bit? I think too much too, but it's mostly just daydreaming about nonsense. Nothing too confusing about that...so far.
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Well, there is a new accent of n00b language. It's called: Vet LUEser goes Foreign!-MegaSpy22
Those must be the pants of the gods!-Digitalpython

I'm just analyzing myself I guess. It's confusing cuz I can't decide what I am...i'm weird in confusing ways and it makes everything so difficult

Like this topic.

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"did you know that in real life all those stats for how often the average person thinks about sex are ACTUALLY about ice cream?"

I call it "mind chess" and I counterindicate it.
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Willis, it seems like every other time you post, I need to look up a word that's in the OED or Urban Dictionary but not both.
-Mimir

It's just crazy in my head...there is just way too much weird stuff going on in there

Probably you ought to let it out then, if it's in there. You'll find it a lot better that way, when you can get other perspectives and ideas instead of just the ones that are confusing you in your head. Haven't you ever heard that a good friend sometimes knows more about yourself than you do?
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Ok here it goes (ok this is probably gonna be really messy and hard to understand cuz it's just gonna be jumbled thoughts):
Sometimes I worry I am a terrible person cuz I get really mad at people who are being jerks. I also get really mad at people who are completely ignorant to the suffering people in the world. Then that gets me to thinking about how i'm too happy that I shouldn't be happy cuz there is all this suffering in the world but then I feel like if i'm not happy i'm being ungrateful. That gets me to thinking about what I wanna do with my life. At this point I wanna be an epidemiologist and help people that way but then there is a part of me that wants to have kids and stay at home with them when/if I get married (if financially possible), that makes me feel like a bad person too. That gets me to thinking about my whole weirdness cuz I wanna get married but i'm kinda doubting I'll ever get a Guy I will get along with that well cuz...i like guys I think they are cute I like when they have muscles (but they don't have to have them)....but i'm not entirely sure I ever want sex which is a problem kinda...i think it's stupid and the only use for it is to make babies which is useful and all but not for me at this point. I just feel like there is something intensely wrong with me. I also confuse myself cuz sometimes I want to be treated like am adult and think I deserve it but other times I like to be treated like a kid cuz in some ways i act like a kid.
There's more stuff up there but I don't want to drop it all at once/don't wanna be a burden...

Nala, you sound just like every other person on the planet. I'm 100% serious right now. I've had those same thoughts go through my head, whether exactly or just slightly different since I'm a guy and all, and trust me, it's all normal.

Pretty much everyone goes through their life asking existential questions such as yours. The fun of it, and of life really, is trying to find those answers.

Also, don't feel guilty for what you have in life. Just be sure to appreciate it and make the most out of what you have. You would have nothing to feel guilty about if you did that, IMHO anyway.
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Well, there is a new accent of n00b language. It's called: Vet LUEser goes Foreign!-MegaSpy22
Those must be the pants of the gods!-Digitalpython

From: darknalareturns | Posted: 6/17/2012 4:53:30 PM | #008

Then that gets me to thinking about how i'm too happy that I shouldn't be happy cuz there is all this suffering in the world but then I feel like if i'm not happy i'm being ungrateful.

Eh, one's own feelings aren't a moral matter. Your feelings of happiness or gratitude have no influence on the suffering of the less fortunate. Nor, incidentally, is your suffering illegitimate merely because other people suffer more.

At this point I wanna be an epidemiologist and help people that way but then there is a part of me that wants to have kids and stay at home with them when/if I get married (if financially possible), that makes me feel like a bad person too.

A lot of female academics attempt to reproduce and care for their children without ending their careers. Which I think is crazy (no mortal can be a good parent and a good scientist), so I'm glad you at least see this as a dilemma. Alternatively, there are applied, non-academic jobs in epidemiology which would probably be much less demanding of your time and therefore make parenting more possible.

i'm not entirely sure I ever want sex which is a problem kinda...i think it's stupid and the only use for it is to make babies which is useful and all but not for me at this point. I just feel like there is something intensely wrong with me.

Well, you wouldn't be the only celibate PMSian, that's for sure. Have you heard of asexuality? Turns out it's a thing. Perhaps you're asexual. Not to say that outright lack of interest is the only reason not to have sex, but it is, contrary to popular belief, a possibility.

http://www.asexuality.org

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"did you know that in real life all those stats for how often the average person thinks about sex are ACTUALLY about ice cream?"

Kodiologist-I've been there for a tiny bit (cuz Brudder suggested it) but I struggle with talking to people about this stuff...and I feel really weird and awkward cuz I can't really talk about this stuff openly at all

Actually, I was suggesting AVEN less as a place to ask questions or discuss things yourself than as a place to get an idea of (a)sexual diversity by reading about other people's feelings and experiences. I know that reading those boards challenged a lot of my ideas about how human sexuality works. The apparent four-way dissociation between (a) sexual attraction (b) "romantic" attraction (c) sexual desire and (d) sexual repulsion is particularly striking.

Do feel free to reach out to me (by email, AIM, Skype, whatever floats your boat) if you like; I read and care a lot about these issues, I can readily empathize with sexual ambivalence (particularly ambivalence about merely talking about sexuality), and I'm a nice guy.

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"did you know that in real life all those stats for how often the average person thinks about sex are ACTUALLY about ice cream?"

I would like to talk to you some time bit i'm on vacation right now. Skype sounds like it could be cool but it might be kinda awkward at first cuz I trend to pause awkward amounts of time when i'm first talking to someone and trying to formulate my ideas

No problem. I'm KodiArfer on Skype. I'm not habitually signed on, so make an appointment with me through some other medium (like email or GameFAQs) when you're ready.

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"did you know that in real life all those stats for how often the average person thinks about sex are ACTUALLY about ice cream?"

Thank you =>

I'm asexual too! A SEXUAL DEVIANT!!!
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"...you should try reading my posts being getting all emo." --FoxMetal

Lol pizza you bastard. Anyways Nala rest assured you face the same problems many of us face. It is because you have compassion that you feel them acutely. Really all one can do is follow ones conscience and do what feels right. Often we force ourselves to suffer as a distraction, or out of pride. If having a child is important to your future but you don't have one, ask yourself why? Is it to commiserate with the less fortunate, out of a desire to suffer and feel pride in your suffering? If children are a good thing to you, accept that blessing with open arms. A sick doctor is a bad doctor, don't you think? How can you tend to others if you don't tend to yourself?
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I feel like I should throw in my two cents. I identified as asexual for a few years after learning about it and finding AVEN. My reasons were similar to yours: I thought sex was disgusting and didn't want it for myself. Through more teaching and unpacking of the Christian view on sex, I learned to appreciate it in the general sense, and through lots of self-exploration I realized my repulsion toward sex was due to assumptions and self-image issues that had been with me for years. Luckily I never "came out", so I saved myself a lot of trouble.

By all of this I guess I mean to say: don't be afraid of going deeper and finding the root causes of your issues. It is, however, definitely possible to overdose on introspection. And sometimes other people can teach you lessons much faster than you can. (Wow, I hadn't signed a yearbook in years, but it looks like I've still got it)
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CSBE FTW!
DarthMarth - Better than a bowl of Cheerios.

You're an ex-asexual, DarthMarth? I'm vaguely disappointed.

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"did you know that in real life all those stats for how often the average person thinks about sex are ACTUALLY about ice cream?"

Not, ex-, I realized I never was and had mis-self-identified. Why are you disappointed?
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CSBE FTW!
DarthMarth - Better than a bowl of Cheerios.

From: DarthMarth | Posted: 6/25/2012 8:21:34 PM | #020

Not, ex-, I realized I never was and had mis-self-identified.

Hey, don't assume that the difference (between a change in one's sexual preferences and a change in one's interpretation of those sexual preferences) is as clear-cut as it might seem. In particular, why couldn't one's interpretation change one's preferences?

Or are you talking about a mere definitional issue? Such as: you called yourself "asexual" originally just because you interpreted repulsion as a sufficient condition for "asexuality", then you realized that a sexual person can be repulsed.

Okay, this stuff is actually really messy. The fact of the matter is, psychometrics has dropped the ball here.

Why are you disappointed?

Mostly I was joking, but you know, I'm antisexual, albeit for a peculiar value of "antisexual". I think that the less sexual desire in this world, the better.

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"did you know that in real life all those stats for how often the average person thinks about sex are ACTUALLY about ice cream?"

Nala, I haven't heard from you. Are you still on vacation, or have you changed your mind?

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"And they call this psychology!"

Yeah i'm still on vacation, and I might be busy for a bit after I get back cuz I have college stuff I have to do. I'm still interested just not sure when I will get to you