Kodi Arfer / Wisterwood

So I'm feeling like a terrible person

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#001 | darknalareturns | Mon 30 Dec 2013 @ 5:25:05 AM (UTC)
Long story short I broke up with my boyfriend because of reasons that make me feel like a shallow terrible person. I tried to make my feelings change, but I couldn't...
#002 | Kodiologist | Mon 30 Dec 2013 @ 1:05:20 PM (UTC)
Story? Everybody likes to hear about a good Seinfeld-style breakup.

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"So, when you are on FACEBOOK 'networking' with all your FRIENDS, what you are really networking with is a bunch of ELECTRONS that could care less about you or your existence."
#003 | LinkPrime1 | Mon 30 Dec 2013 @ 2:11:01 PM (UTC)
Yeah, details would be much appreciated. Chances are, you're feeling guilty for no reason at all anyway =D
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Well, there is a new accent of n00b language. It's called: Vet LUEser goes Foreign!-MegaSpy22
Those must be the pants of the gods!-Digitalpython
#004 | darknalareturns | Mon 30 Dec 2013 @ 3:01:18 PM (UTC)
Things had been on the rocks for a while mostly because I wasn't feeling anything for him anymore and I thought having him come for Christmas would help (he lives in Michigan). Well "big shocker" this last week sucked and everything he did made me mad. I was gonna go with him to Michigan but realized that I couldn't pretend to be in love with him for a week. This resulted in a really dumb straight out of some cheesy bad romance flick train scene where I left the station and he followed me (it was super awkward and dumb and I hated it). After talking he went back to the train station. After I get about 2 blocks away from the train station some lady in a car stops me and tells me she thinks someone is trying to catch up with me. It was him and turns out he left some of his stuff at my house, and I would have told him I would just send it to him, but his train was leaving as we were talking. He didn't have enough money to stay anywhere so he had to stay at my house for basically two days until his dad came to pick him up. So last night I did a lot of soul searching, and I think I came to the conclusion that I realized that I can feel things I didn't think I could feel, and I didn't feel them for my boyfriend. I just didn't feel it was right to stay with him if I realized I could feel those feels and I didn't have them for him. I feel like a terrible person, but I feel like I did the right thing I think. So yeah moral of the story is my life has been some freakish form of a romantic comedy these past few days.
#005 | Kodiologist | Mon 30 Dec 2013 @ 3:22:35 PM (UTC)
So you fell out of love. That seems like an obvious reason for a breakup, although I don't hear it a lot in practice. I'm reminded of Bertrand Russell, who wrote: "I went out bicycling one afternoon, and suddenly, as I was riding along a country road, I realised that I no longer loved Alys [his wife]."

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"So, when you are on FACEBOOK 'networking' with all your FRIENDS, what you are really networking with is a bunch of ELECTRONS that could care less about you or your existence."
#006 | BUM | Mon 30 Dec 2013 @ 4:05:38 PM (UTC)
You maybe shouldn't feel so bad about yourself and just feel a little sad for the situation instead. Because the situation is sad, and it would be unnatural not to be sad about it.

Try not to worry too much about relationships-- they don't always work out. That's why people date. It would be silly to be upset with yourself about one ending, unless it was your own mistakes that led it to its demise. But considering that there was no feeling of love, then that's not your fault.

If, like, there's only a 3% chance that the person you are in a relationship with will be the right one for you, then 97% of the time it's not going to pan out that way. How could that be anything other than expected?

Sometimes, not all of us are called to relationships. Most of us are, but not all of us. Maybe take some time off. Don't get involved too quickly. Emotions are eager to deceive us.
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#007 | HeyDude | Mon 30 Dec 2013 @ 9:44:50 PM (UTC)
^ what he said
#008 | willis5225 | Fri 3 Jan 2014 @ 4:20:14 PM (UTC)
Yeah. What Mark said.

Also, dumping someone always makes you feel like a monster, because you wouldn't be dating someone if you didn't like and care about them, and you're causing them pain in the short term. Just focus on the long term (which is that they--and you--get to try a relationship with someone they like more). Also you get to rapidly detox from those sweet, sweet love hormones and then meet someone else and it's like that first hit all over again. Heck I might go break up right now, in this world of possibility.

No, but seriously you're doing the right thing.

It does suck that he had to stick around for a couple of days. I'm hearing from time to time about people breaking up and having to share a one bedroom for like a week. Man that must just be the worst.
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Willis, it seems like every other time you post, I need to look up a word that's in the OED or Urban Dictionary but not both.
-Mimir